It is my privilege to introduce you to Mick! My encounter with Mick was truly extraordinary in that he managed to capture my attention like no other store employee has been able. In fact, Mick exhibits qualities so exemplary that if we all lived as he does, the world would be a much better place.

Strolling through the Mall of America with my mom, sister, niece, and three children, we passed a toy store called Air Traffic. My son and I were last to pass the store, so everyone else in our party was far ahead when my son pulled me back abruptly to go into the store. I quickly called out and suggested they join us.

We were greeted with a warm welcome by the employees, one being Mick. I answered Mick’s inquiry as to how I was doing today with some generic, in a hurry to get out of this store kind of answer like “just fine, thank you!” (Remember Meet Dan? Clearly I had NOT fully learned my lesson about engaging people authentically around the question “How are you doing?!”) This was when Mick first caught my attention, questioning “Aren’t you going to ask how I am?” Smiling sheepishly, I responded “How are you doing today?” He responded, satisfied I thought, that he reminded me to be more fully present that moment.

An employee engaged me and my two oldest children in a game of Blue Orange Chef Cuckoo! and we headed to the back of the store where my son had discovered a plethora of yo-yos.

See, the reason I decided to go into the store that day was because my son showed such strong interest in the toys. He loves fishing, golfing, balls, Nerf dart guns, and screen time aplenty, but through the years we have had a challenge finding toys that keep his interest. When he was four it was Transformers, kindergarten Pokemon cards, first grade Bakugan, second and third grade baseball cards, and spatterings of interest in legos through the years. We just wanted him to love and have fun with toys. A couple months prior, a yo-yo master’s performance at our childrens’ school wowed our son to the extent that he and other boys purchased trick yo-yos. He had a very strong interest in yo-yos, but also had very low tolerance when the yo-yo did not perform as expected. It had become disconcerting to us as parents to know he was so interested in yo-yos, but was on the other hand getting so extremely frustrated every time he tried. So many times he had tried that yo-yo only to throw it down and quit in frustration because it “wasn’t working.”

Mick approached. I explained to him we were interested in looking more closely at yo-yos because of my son’s strong interest and frustration with his yo-yo.

Mick took time to ask if I was mom or sister of my three kids. Although on my way to 40 and an old soul, I have passed for a teenager countless times the past 15 years. I am used to people thinking I am much younger than I am, but am typically offended because I desire the respect that comes with being perceived as the full-fledged adult that I am. In any case, it was honorable for him to ask if I was mom or sister, a truly unique way of inquiring about my age and relationship to my children!

Mick picked a couple yo-yos off the shelf and put one on the counter next to my daughter. He asked if she wanted to try, stating “I’m going to put one here in case you decide you want to have some fun!” My daughter silently rejected his offer and left the yo-yo right where he had placed it on the counter. Mick observed and said a matter-of-fact “It’s ok, some people don’t want to have fun.” Many talk about enjoyment of life as a choice, this man lived it out in that moment. Choose to have fun, or choose not to have fun. It’s your choice.

Committing to us much more time than necessary, Mick showed us a variety of yo-yos, demonstrating tricks with each one. The store carried the yo-yo my son had; Mick suggested a yo-yo that would be more appropriate for a beginner but would still allow him to do tricks. At the sales counter Mick greeted my sister, complimented her tattoo, and shared with us information about upcoming yo-yo classes as well as a yo-yo championship at the mall the next day.

After purchasing the yo-yo, we left the store and my son immediately took the yo-yo out of its packaging. He spent the next hour trying it out, attempting a few tricks Mick showed us in the store, but quickly became frustrated to the point he felt confident it needed to be returned right now!

Disappointed this wasn’t going to work, I reluctantly returned to the store, son and yo-yo in hand. I found Mick, explained the yo-yo just wasn’t working out as my son expected, and that it looked like we were going to have to return it. Mick caught my attention again, this time even more dramatically by putting the problem back on himself. “Oh it’s my fault. I forgot to show you how to tighten and loosen the string. If we do this, then it should work a lot better for you.” Mick made some “adjustments” and tested the yo-yo to ensure it was indeed working properly, but my son persisted it needed to be returned.

Resigned to the fact this yo-yo “needed” to be returned, Mick and I met at the counter and he began processing the return. Another employee noticed we were back so soon and wondered why we had to return the yo-yo. Holding back tears of disappointment that my son was once again crushing his own dream of learning to yo-yo, I was taken aback when Mick responded nonchalantly to his co-worker, “Yep, it didn’t work out for him today.” I just LOVED the way this man so casually stated the yo-yo didn’t work out today. As if there were so many more activities to discover and become passionate about another day, as if the yo-yo didn’t work this day but might some other day, as if it was no big deal at all. No emotion attached, no worry, no cares, no judgement. It just didn’t work out today, that’s all. Wow, if I could only approach life like Mick, I wouldn’t be disappointed nearly as often and wouldn’t be so anxious about things turning out “right.”

That night, I told my husband the story of Mick and this yo-yo. I knew we had to return the next day for the yo-yo competition and check out the store one more time.

24-hours later, entire family in tow, we returned to the Mall of America to watch the Midwest Regional Yo-Yo Championship. Rotunda packed, yo-yo performances one after the next. Almost immediately, we happened upon Mick at a table of yo-yos. Brave with the opportunity, I approached, explained how he had impacted me so much the day before and asked if I could feature him on my blog. He agreed, but humbly explained that yo-yos just scratch the surface of who he is. He performs with a group called The Danger Committee. You know…he throws knives, juggles and throws a little fire in there for some extra fun! He suggested we should come and check it out sometime. I smiled, curious of course, but honestly having no clue as to what I would discover about this later.

We stepped to the back, observing the yo-yo masters perform. I couldn’t help but think…what if I adopted Mick’s philosophy of embracing what was and realized that for this moment in time, it was OK to just observe? I let myself relax a bit, observed my son as he watched the yo-yo masters. Maybe one day he will want to try yo-yos, but for today, it’s OK just to watch.

One more visit to the store, we picked up a cool frisbee which has caused enjoyment rather than frustration.

Two weeks later, I finally got around to checking The Danger Committee’s website to discover there was much more to Mick than met the eye. The Danger Committee, comprised of Mick and two others, has made multiple national television appearances including advancement to top 100 of 75,000 acts on NBC’s America’s Got Talent, and performs at theaters, festivals and corporate events around the country. Mick has been a performer and keynote speaker for two decades, speaking to hundreds of companies across the United States, Canada, Scotland, Ireland, and England. He has won or placed in international juggling competitions fifteen times. For Mick’s full bio, click here.

I had NO clue who I had encountered that day. I love Mick’s humility and the fact he didn’t brag about who he was beyond his employment at the toy store. I love his attention to the moment, his matter-of-fact attitude, kindness, his patience and passion, and the way he went above and beyond with us in the store that day. I have no idea what Mick speaks about, nor have I ever witnessed The Danger Committee’s performances, but based on everything I learned about Mick’s personal character that day, I have to believe it’s all phenomenal.

Thank you Mick. I am honored to have met you.

So in everything, do to others as you would have them do to you…” Matthew 7:12 

Amy

It is my honor to introduce you to Shawna whose actions served as inspiration for this blog!

I first met Shawna at a Home & Garden show early March 2011. I was strolling through the exhibits with my family and we happened upon Shawna’s booth which featured handmade flower clips. The beauty of the flowers caught my attention. My daughter who is very much into fashion was right behind me. I remember picking up many flowers that day, gently handling each one, viewing them from all angles, admiring the artistry within each creation, and taking special note of the fabrics I found to be most beautiful. My daughter followed suit and began begging me to buy her one. Being the practical and sometimes frugal person I am, I told my daughter “no” gently but as firmly as I could, took a business card, and promised we could call Shawna if we needed flowers for my daughter’s flower girl debut at a wedding the following month. I smiled, said “thank you” to Shawna, and began walking away. Shortly after we left, Shawna came after us with flower in hand. Clipping the flower on my daughter’s boot, she said “this is for you” with a big smile. My daughter broke out in a grin from ear to ear, as did I. We thanked her for being so kindhearted and promised we would be in touch. I couldn’t believe that a complete stranger would be so kind as to give my daughter this beautiful fabric flower clip…just because she had a big heart for a little girl passing by.

Needless to say, when it came time for flower girl preparations later that month and the bride gave us free reign to find a flower for my daughter’s hair and for the flower girl dress, I embraced the opportunity! I contacted Shawna and she advised me to pick out an assortment of fabrics that would match the dress. I poured over all of the options and landed on four or five fabrics I found to be beautiful and matched the color scheme for the wedding. I met Shawna at a local bagel shop, fabrics in hand along with a picture of the flower girl dress for inspiration. For some reason, I vividly remember the large container of fabric flowers Shawna brought that day as samples. She picked up each delicate flower as if it was a masterpiece worthy of great care, just as I had earlier that month at the Home & Garden show. Ultimately, we agreed I would need Shawna to make two flowers, one large for the flower girl dress and one small one for her hair. We parted ways and Shawna promised flowers in one week.

One week later, Shawna and I met again at the bagel shop. This time Shawna had a box of flowers in hand, a beautiful gold box with silver tissue paper lining. Let me be clear. I expected Shawna to bring TWO flowers that day. Instead, she brought SEVEN. One stunning large flower for the flower girl dress, two flower trios for my daughter’s hair that were beautifully arranged miniature bouquets, one “extra” flower she “just made up quickly,” and three little purple hair clips for a cute added touch. I was absolutely stunned. As Shawna pulled each flower out of the box to show me, I could not believe that not only did she meet my expectations, but she exceeded them far beyond most people have ever been able. I remember experiencing such joy that I felt like I was on the edge of tears the whole time she was presenting me with the flowers. I noted, too, that Shawna was glowing with excitement as she shared with me her creations. It was so clear to me that Shawna had a very special gift and she did not hesitate to use it to bring joy to others’ lives. I left, flowers in hand, feeling blessed beyond belief. A week later, I experienced the joy all over again when the stylist chose one of the flowers for my daughter’s hair, and I pinned a flower on her flower girl dress just hours before she walked down the aisle.

To this day, I have kept the box of flowers in a special place in my closet. I never threw away the box because I want to always be reminded of the special gift Shawna brought to me that day. Those flowers were so much more than fabric pieced together for a flower girl’s hair and dress. They were a reminder that there is always beauty to be discovered in this world, that God has endowed each one of us with special gifts that He longs for us to share with others, and that I need to be much more intentional about seeing and experiencing the joy others bring to my life. If I enter each day having an extremely high set of expectations, I will ALWAYS be disappointed. If I enter each day asking God to give me fresh eyes to see what is often unseen, my expectations will always be exceeded far beyond what I could have imagined.

Today I challenge and encourage you…

Are you living life slowly and intentionally enough so that you can truly see people?

Do you accept the gifts others bring into your life, or do you overlook or disregard these gifts because you are too busy to notice or don’t feel worthy?

What special gifts do you possess? Are you using your gifts to make a difference in others’ lives?

We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully. Romans 12:6-8

Amy

It is my pleasure to introduce you to Dan! The details of this interaction with Dan have very little to do with the fact that he is my pastor. In fact, this story tells of an extraordinary encounter with a fellow human being who pushed beyond the status quo.

I arrived at church late that Sunday morning, so I quietly seated myself at the back of the sanctuary, baby on floor sleeping in her car seat. I brought change and uncertainty with me that day.

I had been home on maternity leave with our third child. In just a week, I was set to return to work in my part-time private practice as a speech-language pathologist. I was already clinging to these last days at home, kids at school and alone with my baby girl, free of constant distraction and stress that work brings. I had been in the bubble of maternity leave, but what revelations and changes were to come when I embarked on the new normal as a part-time working mama with three children?

I knew for a while I was going to stop nursing the baby that day. I knew the third time around it was going to be better to complete the weaning process before returning to work. Pumping in my car in random parking lots didn’t sound enticing nor feasible with my work schedule, and I was eager to lose those extra 15 pounds of baby weight and wear my normal clothes again. I know some may believe this to be selfish, but with all three of my babies I had a love-hate relationship with nursing and had to give myself permission to do what felt right for me as a mother. So that morning at 3:00 a.m. I nursed my baby for the last time, quietly, together.

A church on the hill was opening doors that day. Every week on the way to church we passed this new church. The kids admired the beautiful building on the hill, begging to visit so they could go to Sunday school with children they knew attended, but we passed, traveling minutes beyond to our church. The dilemma had nothing to do with the church on the hill, for we had many connections with people there. As adults, the dilemma was that we LOVED our church, had found our home there, and had no intentions of leaving. We were spiritually fed, loved our pastors and the worship team, and felt a just right level of connection there. On this weekend, my husband and I had spent a tremendous amount of time debating where to go to church, leaving me in tears because it was such a confusing and important decision. We wanted to do what was right and best for our family as a whole. Should we attend the other church, opening day for the new building and an opportunity to insert ourselves into this new place, or should we pass by yet another week to our church, knowing the kids would see the cars in the lot? Knowing there was no perfect answer, we decided to delay the decision and wait for more clear direction. I would go to church with baby, and my husband would stay home with the two older kids. This was a solution for the moment.

After the service, Dan approached me asking “How are you doing?” I smiled, answering vaguely like “Oh fine, it’s been a little crazy. Just getting adjusted to life with three.” All the while, knowing he had hundreds of other people to greet besides me, thinking he was possibly just being polite because he noticed I was alone this week.

Dan proceeded deeper into conversation stating he noticed I hadn’t been tweeting as much since the birth of the baby. A pastor of a church this big noticed my tweeting pattern had reduced with the birth of our baby? My only response was to trust, because I had been tweeting less. Dan introduced me to a couple who was going to have their baby baptized the same day we were having our daughter baptized. Again, a pastor of a church this big remembered the date we were going to have our baby baptized, scheduled months later?

Conversation subsided and Dan turned to me again, asking a second time “So, how have you been doing?” Taken aback by his second rendering of the question, I answered, this time giving him more. I was going to be returning to work in a week, what the plans were for child care, how it had certainly been an adjustment to three but that our baby had been such an enormous blessing to our family and that we just love her so much. Eventually, our conversation wrapped up and we parted ways.

I could have shared more about how I was really doing, the changes I was about to experience balancing work and motherhood all over again, the debates we were having about church. It wouldn’t have been practical considering this was passing conversation after church. To be honest though, I didn’t feel at all deprived because in my recollection, nobody had EVER asked me how I was doing twice in one conversation.

So many questions came to mind in light of my encounter with Dan…

What was it that made Dan ask me how I was doing not once, but TWICE?

Why is it that I assumed Dan needed to talk to other people more than me? Why did I not believe it was me he wanted to talk to that day?

Why has this culture reinforced “Hi, how are you?” “Fine, how are you?” so much that I assume people don’t want to hear my real answer to that question anymore?

When was the last time I slowed down, really asked someone “How are you doing?,” and was sincerely open to hear the answer?

When was the last time I responded genuinely to somebody that asked me “How are you doing?”

Thank you Dan for asking how I was doing in a way that made me feel you genuinely wanted to hear my answer. Because of your model, I now challenge myself to give a sincere answer when necessary, even if it means admitting “I’m not doing very well today” or “Actually, I’ve been feeling really overwhelmed lately,” opening space for more authentic dialogue, connection, and truth.

“No one should seek their own good, but the good of others.” 1 Corinthians 10:24

Amy